It's improper to brag about your children's achievements in a college graduation announcement

QUESTION: my son is graduating from college. we have ordered and received his school's personalized announcements. they're lovely, however, when ordering, there was no opportunity to include the fact that he is graduating magna cum laude. i would like to include a small card (ie: calling card/business card size) which i would print in the same font used on the announcement. can you suggest appropriate wording for this card on which i wish to indicate this wonderful achievement?
Deborah
ANSWER: It is considered unseemly to brag about one's achievements even if they are your child; which is why you don't announce it with the graduation. It's not appropriate and it's considered very tacky. You will, however, have the pleasure of watching him graduate with a special collar on his gown to indicate that he is a magna grad and they will also announce the names of the honors graduates and give them their diploma in a group. I think you will also notice that in the announcements there's a special color in the school emblem that denotes he's an honor graduate and his diploma will also indicate that he is an honors graduate.

FOLLOW-UP QUESTION: hello...thank you very much for your quick response! i will carefully consider your opinion. i am really puzzled, though, by your opinion that including the level of honor associated with his graduation is unseemly, tacky and inappropriate.the reason i even considered including exceptional honors within his graduation announcement is that i have two sons graduating in may from two different universities; ironically, the school from which one is graduating, but not with honors, does give the option of noting honors on the announcement. each of these schools' announcements are being produced by the same nationally known company. Jostens tells me that the school makes the decision, usually based on space vs information regarding dates, locations, etc. that the school wishes to have included on the announcement.yes, my son who is graduating with honors will wear a hood of a different color, indicating honors (this will be seen of course, only by those of us actually attending the ceremonies); but there is no indicator on the emblem on the announcement; finally, is it your opinion that a company such as Jostens would encourage inclusion of honors on the announcement if it was truly considered 'tacky'?

ANSWER: It is considered unseemly and tacky to brag about one's achievements in polite American society. The reason for this is to protect the tender feelings of someone who may have tried their very best to also be an honor student and didn't quite make it. Obviously you have your heart set on putting in a card about your son graduating with honors, so no matter how you word it, to everyone who receives one it will read like this:"Junior is graduating with honors. I'm telling you this because it's the only achievement or thing I have to talk about in my totally boring life. I also want to lord it over you since YOUR child didn't manage to graduate with honors and make you feel like an inadequate parent and because I am totally lacking in class and social skills. I put this card in the graduation announcement so you can laugh at me behind my back about my totally tacky announcement and speculate about when you will get the announcement about how much he will be making when he finally gets a job."Since this is exactly what people will think and say when they get the announcement, you can let them know that you already know what they will say and think and save yourself a lot of time. Of course if you are not in the USA, there might be different customs, I believe some cultures in the third world DO brag about their weight, salary and age.
FOLLOW-UP QUESTION: how do you equate including high honors on a graduation announcement with bragging about ones weight, salary or age? your comment about protecting the 'tender feelings of someone who may have tried their very best to also be an honor student but didn't quite make it' sounds like those who think NO achievement should be celebrated, so that those who didn't reach the same achievement won't feel hurt. perhaps the honor student shouldn't be distinguished by the color on their gown, or wording on their diploma, either. what about the students who tried their best to graduate from college but didn't quite make it? perhaps no graduation announcement should be sent at all. perhaps no ceremony should be held.what about the boy who tried his very best to make the athletic team but just didn't have quite enough talent? do we not celebrate the efforts of those who are able to rise to the top? or do we say 'never mind, let's not have a team, because little johnny just can't catch and he'll be so hurt if we play, and especially if we catch, in front of him?’ you are not correct in assuming that i 'have my heart set on' including this card. i am still weighing my decision. but your acerbic accusation: "I'm telling you this because it's the only achievement or thing I have to talk about in my totally boring life." is by far the rudest thing i can remember hearing in quite some time. what causes you to be so petty and ugly in your response? no one who would compose such a vicious sounding response should tout herself as an ‘expert in good manners’.
Answer:
RE-READ my answer, either you were too busy overreacting to comprehend or even read correctly what my reply was or English isn't your native language. You asked me a question. I answered it. You then proceeded to send me a dissertation on why you felt it would be OK to do what I told you was a horridly tacky thing to do since one of the schools your children attend puts a different color on the announcement for honor graduates. I sent you a reply that you didn't like because you either did NOT read it or reading comprehension isn't one of your strong points. If you want to try to impress the people at your trailer park, have at it. It won't be me they will be making fun of and my answer was neither rude nor ugly, it was an example of how people react and think in this type of social situation, not a personal slam--it has nothing to do with your apparent delusion that your child's achievement makes you wonderful and that the rest of the world is just drooling to hear about how your son managed to graduate a magna, quite frankly, no one other than you (and possibly graduate school admissions people) gives a shit.